Page 4 - JR March 3 21 FINAL

Are the kids all right?

BY JENN DIRECTOR adults and one psychologist,
KNUDSEN each in his or her own Zoom
box. A parent-free zone, the fo-
How are our teens doing? rum’s only other adult interlop-
Mel Berwin has been ask- ers in addition to Berwin and
ing herself this question a lot. Nelson were the other commu-
Particularly throughout Janu- nity organizers and ALIYAH
ary, Mental Health Awareness Tichon teachers.
Month. (A parent-only forum follows
She knew that during Jan- March 16. See box at right.)
uary, organizations like the Teens in grades 8 through Panelists Abby Diebold and Lev Weingrad
Jewish Federation of Greater 12 listened intently as young
Portland, Portland Area Jewish adults Abby Diebold, 23, and Parent forum: The kids are not all right
Educators, Jewish Family & Lev Weingrad, 19, both of Allan D.A. Cordova, Ph.D., a psychologist with the Port-
Child Service, and the Oregon whom grew up at Neveh Sha- land-based Children’s Program, says, “While I absolutely be-
Board of Rabbis were pro- lom, candidly shared their own lieve there’s value in professional services and expertise, we
viding potentially life-saving, experiences with depression, also know that peer-to-peer support is incredibly important.”
mental-health information via suicidal ideation, and other Now it’s the parents’ turn.
online resources like panels, Q mental-health challenges. We- “We want them to hear what the teens heard,” says Feder-
and A events, and group ses- ingrad is Berwin’s eldest child. ation’s Rachel Nelson of the Feb. 3 Teen Mental Wellness
sions – all of which were direct- He graduated from Wilson Forum. Cordova, Nelson and Mel Berwin of Neveh Shalom
ed to and structured for adults. High School, renamed Ida B. want the parents to learn, for example, how they might start a
“Can we bring programming Wells High School in January. conversation with their teen about mental health and how to
like this to our teens?” won- After the event, Weingrad elicit more from their child than, say, “I’m fine,” especially
dered Berwin, Congregation shared that after some initial when they are really hurting.
Neveh Shalom’s director of hesitation, “I decided to par- This 6 pm, March 16 session on Zoom is intended for parents
congregational learning. She ticipate... once I realized that of teens. Parents are invited to listen to and ask questions of
brought her question to Rachel I was in a unique position to many of the Teen Forum’s panelists, including Cordova and
Nelson, Federation’s director of reach boys who are struggling young adults Lev Weingrad, Abby Diebold and Lili Stadler.
educational initiatives and inter in school and in life.” The program is sponsored by the Jewish Federation of Greater
group outreach. Weingrad, who is no stranger Portland and Jewish Family & Child Service.
Berwin and Nelson thought- to depression, continued. “It Register at jewishportland.org/teenmentalwellness.
fully and quickly created a one- became my goal to speak to the For more information on the program, contact Mel Berwin at
time, teen-only event open to boys whose shoes I was once in mberwin@nevehshalom.org.
the community. The goal was not long ago and provide them
to uplift the teens through lis- with a booster of sorts to keep
tening to – and asking questions them in the fight.” Tips for parents
anonymously of – young adults He recognizes that pandem-
speaking frankly about their ic life right now is so hard on • Attend to your own mental health and well-being. This helps
own mental-health challenges. young people and that resources you serve as the best possible role model for your teen and
The young adults shared how may be fewer than those he had. helps you be stronger to support your teen.
they successfully cope with, “I could find some respite • Watch out for your OWN avoidance and withdrawal
or have coped with, thier chal- by going to my local game behaviors. When our teens pull away, we may tend to do
lenges. store and playing Magic: The the same. These kinds of behaviors might include regularly
“The more we can normalize Gathering with friends and ac- drinking or using substances (if you feel like you really “need”
mental-health struggles, the quaintances,” says Weingrad, it, it’s a good idea to skip it); using your phone or computer
better off we’re going to be as noting the online world was excessively or reflexively; and retreating more into work.
individuals and as a communi- and remains a healthy get-away • Look for small wins and take advantage of openings. For
ty,” Nelson says. place, “... something which I example, your teen wanting to show you a funny TikTok or
“It takes something really recommend to anyone.” post could be a small win – it represents them sharing their
special to get people online Diebold, now communica- world with you. Other wins could be joining you for a meal,
sharing their frustration about distance learning or walking
right now,” says Berwin, not- tions director for a Pennsyl- around the block with you.
ing that anyone over-Zoomed vania state senator, wanted to • Don’t underestimate the power of a change of scenery.
is familiar with the on-screen, emphasize to the teens that Get out for a drive together (let your teen drive if they are a
glazed-over eyes and overuse depression “can look a lot of learner or licensed) or walk to get ice cream or coffee. Any-
of the platform’s “video off” different ways,” as did hers. thing that can get you out of the house together can have a
option. For the forum event, “You grow up seeing depic- noticeable impact on mood and energy.
“The teens’ eyes were glued to tions of people with depression • Be transparent with teens. Say something like, “I think you
the screen,” she says. And their who wear a lot of black, don’t might find this annoying, but I really need you to know I’m
minds to the material. go to school, sleep a lot, listen to here and that I care. So, I want us to come up with a plan to
On Feb. 3, the virtual Teen ‘My Chemical Romance,’” she stay more connected and have a little more fun together.”
Mental Wellness Forum drew ~ Allan D.A. Cordova, psychologist
about 20 teens, four young Continued on next page
4 Jewish Review March 3, 2021