Page 10 - 1913 November - To Dragma

TO DRAGMA OF ALPHA OMICRON PI 15

Of course, I do not mean for a moment that we should accept
for membership any girl just because one of our number desires us
to do so. This fitness for the whole and judging for the greater pur-
pose and not for personal feeling is one of our important character
builders. Of course, we should judge, without criticism, whether the
candidate will be congenial to all, will uphold and understand our
particular ideals, will grow harmoniously for the good of all, will en-
joy and improve us. But judge dispassionately, never with prejudice
except in favor of a sister's friend, never unkindly or superficially
and adversely only with regret and on calm sufficient ground.

II.—Another charge is made: that the fraternities cause heart-
burnings to those who are not asked.

This is often true and it has always been a grief to members
of fraternities.

How to cure it? By abolishing fraternities? Nonsense! Do so,
and you will have cliques and clubs and circles and cir-
cles-within-circles just the same, all with accompanying heartburn-
ings. Why, when we were little girls, very little ones, at school we
formed these little bands without knowing it. And then, now, and
always those who desire to win their way into any closely bound group,
whatever it is called, can do so only by winning its members. This, not
because the members of such group think themselves above others, but
just because they fit each other's hearts and intentions and any one
else who does so will naturally "find" them. I t is puerile to try to
regulate a universal fact by abolishing the fraternities.

I have proved this point by making some careful inquiries and in-
vestigations among the graduates of colleges in which there are no
fraternities. I n every case I have been told of "eating clubs," "literary
clubs", "secret circles" and simply unnamed cliques and groups of
pals among which,—such bodies having no central traditions or stand-
ing to uphold and no central disciplinary board,—I have found these
evils far greater than they are where fraternities exist.

One distinguished woman was deploring to me the bitterness and
foolishness of the "crushes" that had marred the life at one of
our greatest colleges for women when she was a student there a few
years ago,—a condition which later investigation shows still to exist.
"Crushes?" I asked. "Yes,—foolish love affairs between girls,
usually unrequited,—jealousies,—sending candies and flowers,—tears,
— i t is too silly for words." "Why," I said, "we had nothing of the
sort at Barnard." "Ah, no," she replied. "You have the frater-
nities there.—a normal outlet for young girls' naturally intense
affections."

Another interesting result of this investigation has been that among