Page 141 - SHERLOCK transcripts

140

John grimaces and puts away the phone.)

HICKMAN GALLERY. An elegantly dressed woman walks into the large white-painted room which
is displaying the Vermeer painting. There is no other artwork or furniture of any kind in the
room, but two rows of free-standing posts are roped together to form a path to the picture. The
woman stops at the sight of a security man in a black jacket and black cap standing in front of
the painting with his back to her.
MISS WENCESLAS (in an Eastern European accent): Don’t you have something to do?
SHERLOCK (for it is he): Just admiring the view.
MISS WENCESLAS: Yes. Lovely. Now get back to work. We open tonight.
(Sherlock looks over his shoulder and then turns and walks towards her.)
SHERLOCK: Doesn’t it bother you?
MISS WENCESLAS: What?
SHERLOCK: That the painting’s a fake.
MISS WENCESLAS (angrily): What?
SHERLOCK: It’s a fake. It has to be. It’s the only possible explanation.
(Getting closer to her, he looks at her I.D. badge.)
SHERLOCK: You’re in charge, aren’t you, Miss Wenceslas?
[And yes, he does call her Miss Wencleslas both here and later. I can only presume that this is a
Benedict thing rather than a Sherlock thing – that’s a lot of sibilance to pronounce when you
have a tendency to lisp.]
MISS WENCESLAS: Who are you?
SHERLOCK (getting into her face and staring into her eyes): Alex Woodbridge knew that the
painting was a fake, so somebody sent the Golem to take care of him. Was it you?
MISS WENCESLAS: Golem? What the hell are you talking about?
SHERLOCK: Or are you working for someone else? Did you fake it for them?
MISS WENCESLAS: It’s not a fake.
SHERLOCK: It is a fake. Don’t know why, but there’s something wrong with it. There has to be.
MISS WENCESLAS: What the hell are you on about? You know, I could have you sacked on the
spot.
SHERLOCK: Not a problem.
MISS WENCESLAS: No?
SHERLOCK: No. I don’t work here, you see. Just popped in to give you a bit of friendly advice.
MISS WENCESLAS: How did you get in?
SHERLOCK (scornfully): Please.
MISS WENCESLAS: I want to know.
SHERLOCK: The art of disguise is knowing how to hide in plain sight.
(He turns and begins to walk away, taking off his cap.)
MISS WENCESLAS: Who are you?
SHERLOCK: Sherlock Holmes.
(He drops the cap onto the top of one of the railing posts and continues onwards.)
MISS WENCESLAS: Am I supposed to be impressed?
SHERLOCK: You should be.
(Taking off the jacket, he looks round at her as he deliberately drops it on the floor. Reaching
the doors, he flamboyantly shoves one open, almost dancing out of the room.)
SHERLOCK: Have a nice day!
(Miss Wenceslas walks closer to the painting and looks at it as the door slowly and squeakily
swings closed.)

WESTIE’S FLAT. John is sitting on the sofa beside Andrew West’s fiancée. He has been there
long enough for her to have made them mugs of something which are on the coffee table in
front of them. Lucy is upset throughout the ensuing conversation.
LUCY: He wouldn’t. He just wouldn’t.
JOHN (gently): Well, stranger things have happened.
LUCY: Westie wasn’t a traitor. It’s a horrible thing to say!
JOHN: I’m sorry, but you must understand that’s ...
LUCY: That’s what they think, isn’t it, his bosses?
JOHN (nodding): He was a young man, about to get married. He had debts ...
LUCY: Everyone’s got debts; and Westie wouldn’t wanna clear them by selling out his country.
JOHN: Can you, um, can you tell me exactly what happened that night?

Transcripts by Ariane DeVere (arianedevere@livejournal.com)