Page 86 - Mother & Baby - UK (March 2020)

Meaningful

ME-TIME

In the midst of manic motherhood, every mum needs

her Unicorn Space. Confused? Read on…

t’s 8pm and the house is finally quiet dabbled in – but it’s an important one. Eve
after a day of chaos. Your baby is has dubbed this time as Unicorn Space. That
asleep after some resistance, and the might make it sound magical, whimsical, and

remnants of dinner have been cleared even slightly unobtainable but, don’t worry,
away. A pocket of glorious free it’s actually pretty straightforward.
Itime stretches out in front of you. ‘Unicorn Space allows you to reclaim or
The question is – what exactly do you do discover the interests or talents that make you
with this rare opportunity? MEET THE uniquely you, driving you to be the fullest
For many of us mums, it’s time to try to EXPERT expression of yourself,’ she explains. ‘It boosts
make a dent in the never-ending to-do list your individual happiness and strengthens
of jobs that need to be done. It hardly even Eve Rodsky is an partnerships. The necessity for Unicorn Space
crosses our minds that we could use this organisational emerged from my interviews with hundreds
time for... ourselves! specialist, author of of women around the world who shared a
‘Many new mums willingly take on this Fair Play (£16.99, longing for their pre-parent self, or for a new
new role without fully recognising the endless Quercus), and version of themselves that they described
emotional, mental, and physical effort a mum of three as “more alive”, “fuller”, “expressive”
parenthood requires,’ says organisational and “purposeful”.’
specialist and author Eve Rodsky. ‘Before Unicorn Space is not just another version
we can catch our breath in between sterilising of self-care, either. While that might include
bottles, doing dishes, folding laundry, you getting a massage, or cosying up with
restocking the nursery, running to the a good book, Unicorn Space is a form of
supermarket, picking up prescriptions, meaningful me-time which is connected to a
preparing meals, tidying up, and attending larger goal that can also be shared with others
to our little ones, we discover that we have in some way. While both are important, these
no time left for ourselves.’ should be treated as very separate things.
WORDS EMILY THORPE PHOTOGRAPHY ISTOCK, GETTY IMAGES
And it’s not just this eternal busyness that If you’re thinking to yourself, ‘Sure,
may prevent you from spending any time Unicorn Space sounds great! But how on
on yourself – we’re all-too familiar with

the looming presence of mum-guilt, too.
‘Recent research exploring mother’s guilt
found that mothers feel far guiltier than
fathers,’ says Eve. ‘So many of us have bought
into the cultural messaging that a good
mother spends the bulk of her available time
in service to the family, or risk suffering

disapproval from her community, peers and
even her partner for spending her hours
differently. But it’s time that we re-frame
what it means to be a “good” mum as a
woman who spends her time in service to
her family and to herself.’
Time where you’re not being mum may feel
like a rare experience you’ve only occasionally

84 | Mar ch 2020 | mothe ra ndbaby.co.uk