Page 62 - Star Wars Insider (Special Edition 2020)

EACH WEEK ON THE CLONE WARS, JEDI MASTER YODA OFFERS SAGE ADVICE TO HIS FELLOW JEDI.
INSIDER QUESTIONS HIS ALTER EGO, ACTOR TOM KANE, TO SEE WHAT WORDS OF WISDOM HE’D
OFFER IN THE FOLLOWING PECULIAR SCENARIOS. WORDS: CHRIS SPITALE

Dark Father Knows Best: Luke wants
to spend all his time racing speeders,
hunting womp rats, and cantina-hopping.
How can Dad Vader lay down the law
without inciting teenage rebellion?
Take the crystal out of his lightsaber,
he should. No blue milk will he get
with his cookies tonight.

Extreme Hovel Makeover: Luke’s
humble Tatooine abode may have
been recklessly torched, but the
structure’s still solid. How do you
spruce up the charred adobe?
Yoda answers
some tough Some fresh stucco and paint, and look like
questions. But new it will. The “barbecued Beru” smell?
will we be able to Much harder to get rid of, that will be.
understand the
answers?
Coruscant Crime Scene Investigation: NAME: TOM KANE
Who’s trying to kill Senator Amidala this
week? Help C-3PO ALIAS: YODA
and Jar Jar figure it
out! The only clues FIRST APPEARANCE: Star Wars: The
are a toothpick, a bola,
Clone Wars (2008)
and a drop of green blood.
Serious, are you? A newborn
Huttlet, figure that one out he Who’s the Bossk? How does a Trandoshan
could. But Threepio and Jar-Jar? handle his domestic duties when the head of
Hmm not the brightest lasers the household, Aurra Sing, spends too much
on the Death Star, are they? time at work, and the youngest of the clan, I
Boba Fett, has a serious attitude problem?
The Baron: Help dashing Aurra Sing away too much? A problem, that
Lando Calrissian
L is not! In Boba Fett’s face Bossk should not
e
select the get, as one encounter with Bossk-breath
g is enough to make even a Sith think twice.
girl of his
dreams! Lord Vader’s mask, you would need! NTERROGATION DROID: TOM KANE
The finalists
are a tantalizing Three Ewoks and a Wokling: Logray, Chief
Twi’lek, a Snootie Chirpa, and Teebo find an abandoned baby
songstress, and assassin Ewok in a basket on the doorstep of their
Asajj. Who should he give the bachelor pad. Do they raise the little furball
poola blossom to? or shirk the responsibility in favor of the
poola blossom to
Know Lando well, you do not. Ewok party life?
Select the girl of his dreams? Find a Wokling, have they? Fortunate, they
Many dreams Lando has, and will find this. A better “Chick Magnet” than
almost as many girls! a Wokling there is not in the entire galaxy! a

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