Page 8 - Berg_Mortuary_Bishops_Guide

8 BISHOP’S GUIDE

BISHOPS GUIDE

SUPPORT PRIOR TO THE FUNERAL

Grief associated with death will differ with each family. Weather the death was sudden or due
to a lingering illness, family members will experience various emotions and feelings.

Generally, a person will experience denial, or the refusal to accept the reality of death. Also,

they may become angry at people and circumstances. And of course, sorrow will be felt and
expressed. Eventually, acceptance will occur as well as a change in lifestyle in order to adapt to
the loss. Of course, if a person is having great difficulty in adjusting to the loss, or it continues
for an extensive time, it may be wise to recommend help.

Death often brings people closer to their religious convictions. Thus, as the Bishop, you may

become a central figure to the family. They may rely on you for counsel and directions, as well
as seek your help in dealing with the special needs created by the loss. The following list of
seven suggestions are ways you can help the family satisfy those needs.
• Show concern. If nothing else, this will let the family know you care for them and are
mindful of the situation.
• Offer spiritual assistance, such as prayers and blessings. Also have an open ear and allow
the family to express their grief and concerns.
• Arrange for others from your ward to visit and give support.

• Review with the family the plan of salvation, the purpose of mortality, and the life hereafter.
• Refer the family to some proper books or other literature dealing with death and
overcoming grief.
• If requested, assist in planning the funeral. We recommend that families choose a mor-
tuary and make contact with them so they can offer their advice and expertise. A family
can pre-arrange both dictate their specific desires. These records will be kept on file at the
mortuary for ready reference when the need arises. Planning ahead is a proven method for
reducing stress and pressure at a very emotional time. However, caution should be exer-
cised when deciding upon a pre-arranged funeral. Numerous prearrangement programs
exist, some are excellent and some are insufficient. Families should feel confident in their
choice, knowing that the pre-arrangement program they choose will fulfill all their finan-
cial and emotional needs.
• At the time of death, it is not required that a doctor be in attendance. He will however, be
requested to indicate the cause of death by signing a death certificate. The funeral director
will arrange for this with the doctor. The state medical examiner is involved when the doc-
tor will not indicate the cause of death, or if the doctor has not seen the decreased within
30 days. Deaths of a suspicious nature are under the jurisdiction of the medical examiner,
and the funeral director will comply with this regulation.