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202 PART 3: THE PERSONAL SIDE OF LEADERSHIP
they have the ability to choose and to act with integrity. They don’t blame others
or life’s circumstances for their outcomes. Eleanor Roosevelt was talking about
being proactive when she observed that, “No one can make you feel inferior with-
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out your consent.” Proactive people know that it is not what happens to them
but how they respond to it that ultimately matters.

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Habit 2: Begin with the End in Mind This means to start with a clear
mental image of your destination. For each individual, beginning with the end
in mind means knowing what you want, what is deeply important to you, so
that you can live each day in a way that contributes to your personal vision.
In addition to clarifying goals and plans, this habit entails establishing guiding
principles and values for achieving them.

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Habit 3: Put First Things First This habit encourages people to gain con-
trol of time and events by relating them to their goals and by managing them-
selves. It means that, rather than getting tangled up dealing with things, time,
and activities, we should focus on preserving and enhancing relationships and
on accomplishing results.

Effective Interdependence

The first three habits build a foundation of independence, from which one can
move to interdependence—caring, productive relationships with others—which
Covey calls public victories. Moving to effective interdependence involves open
communication, effective teamwork, and building positive relationships based on
trust, caring, and respect, topics that are discussed throughout this book. No
matter what position you hold in the organization, when you move to interdepen-
dence, you step into a leadership role.

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Habit 4: Think Win–Win To think win–win means understanding that without
cooperation, the organization cannot succeed. When followers understand this,
they cooperate in ways that ensure their mutual success and allow everyone to
come out a winner. Win–win is a frame of mind and heart that seeks agreements
or solutions that are mutually benefi cial and satisfying.

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Habit 5: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood This principle
is the key to effective communication. Many people don’t listen with the intent
to understand; they are too busy thinking about what they want to say. Seeking
first to understand requires being nonjudgmental and able to empathize with the

other person’s situation. Empathetic listening gets inside another person’s frame
of reference so that you can better understand how that person feels. Chapter 9
discusses communication in detail.

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Habit 6: Synergize Synergy is the combined action that occurs when people
work together to create new alternatives and solutions. In addition, the greatest
opportunity for synergy occurs when people have different viewpoints, because
the differences present new opportunities. The essence of synergy is to value and
respect differences and take advantage of them to build on strengths and compen-
sate for weaknesses.