Page 90 - Cosmopolitan - UK (April 2020)
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re a d
their outfits or pose for here for years. But
selfies. Those in high thank you for
heels are often turned considering us, have a
away – their footwear nice night.” They then
a sign that they don’t walked away calmly.
plan on dancing much. Appreciating this, she
Most prepare for a chased after them,
night out in Berlin as invited them in and
if they are going on an bought them a round.
expedition: donning But for every group
trainers and putting who walks away
hoodies in their calmly, there’s another
backpacks. The parties who thinks they can
can last anything from threaten their way
12 hours to three days inside. All the bouncers
– thanks to licensing I spoke to have
laws that don’t set experienced violence
a closing time. The – from the time that
sound systems are Esther was punched to
overpowering and Eli having to barricade
sex is in the air: some herself and her staff
places have hidden inside while a mob
rooms where people hurled stones at them.
can sneak off and do Incidents like this are
whatever they want. Esther would rare but the insults
But in the legendary reject people are endless. And no
to keep the
S&M KitKatClub, space safe amount of training can
there’s no need for prepare you for the
secret rooms – that’s impact of being called
what the dancefloors are on one thing: their gut “We keep a “bitch” (and much worse)
for. Most people hold feeling. But this can be night after night. Both Eli
half-empty beer bottles, hard to explain.“You can’t the magic and Saskia scaled back their
water or energy drinks – tell guests,‘So it’s my hours as a result. “I began
few down spirits. A desire personal feeling [that] unbroken to lose all empathy,” says Eli,
to keep going as long as you’re not for the crowd, “I started work pissed off.”
possible and a drinking bye!’ but that’s really how – and that Saskia found she was getting
culture that isn’t “who can it goes,” explains Saskia. angrier in her daily life.
get absolutely hammered Esther says she sometimes has a cost” Esther, at some points, was
quickest” means that tests people by asking afraid to walk to the club,
clubbers are respectful. them to crack jokes about used to experiment, letting taking taxis to avoid being
But one thing is not themselves. “I want to see if in those who she had doubts recognised. “It felt like the
tolerated: photos. If you’re they can be self-deprecating,” about. “I’d almost always more I was at the door,
caught taking a picture, she says. “I was always the have to kick them back out the more bad situations
you’re thrown out within biggest bitch to those I’d again for being rude to the occurred. I felt tired and
seconds. It’s so strictly end up letting in, but I was staff,” she says. “It would empty.” She reflected on her
prohibited that those at super-friendly to the people remind me to trust myself.” life and wondered: “Was all
the door put stickers over I rejected. I’d say, ‘You’re But mistakes happen. And if I did ruin people’s fun?”
people’s phone cameras. looking too good for this you’re turned away, the best
It doesn’t take long for place, this other club seems thing you can do is handle it Sugar and spice
Alina to decide who gets in. to suit your style more.’” well. Saskia recalls rejecting From the moment we are
Each of the women I spoke Learning to trust your a larger group who politely born, there’s an expectation
to unanimously agreed that gut instinct can be tough, said, “We’re really unhappy placed firmly on women’s
.
they make decisions based and take years to master. Eli as we’ve wanted to come shoulders to be “nice” To
90 · COSMOPOLITAN
