Page 343 - Fourth Wing

burns behind my closed eyes, followed by the boom of thunder. Thunder-

snow isn’t uncommon around here, but damn does it summarize how this
feels, wild and out of control.

But then he breaks the kiss with a sharp gasp, his brow furrowing with

something akin to panic before he slams his eyes shut.
I’m still struggling to draw a full breath when he abruptly steps away

from the wall and palms the backs of my thighs, setting me on my feet

again. He makes sure I’m steady and then retreats a few feet, like the
distance will save his life.

“You have to go.” His words are clipped and at odds with the heat in his

eyes, his ragged breaths.
“Why?” The cold is a shock to my system without his body heat.

“Because I can’t.” He rakes both hands through his hair and leaves them
on the top of his head. “And I refuse to act on desire that isn’t yours. So you

have to walk back up those steps. Now.”

I shake my head. “But I want—” Everything.
“This isn’t your want.” He tilts his head up at the sky. “That’s the fucking

problem. And I can’t leave you out here on your own, so have just a little
mercy on me and go.”

Silence ices over between us as I get ahold of myself. He’s saying no.

And the shitty part about it isn’t the chill of chivalrous rejection. It’s that
he’s right. This started because I couldn’t tell Tairn’s emotions from my

own. But those emotions are gone, aren’t they? My door is wide open, and I

don’t feel anything coming from Tairn’s direction.
I manage a nod, and then I flee for the second time tonight, climbing the

steps as quickly as possible to get back to the citadel. My shields are open,

but I don’t bother stopping to shut that mental door, since Tairn isn’t
barging through.

Common sense prevails by the time I reach the top, my thighs burning
from the workout. Xaden stopped us from making a huge mistake.