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He passed away due to covid in January right after new years, the doctors all
did their best to save him but it was too late, he was in a critical stage and
suddenly he didnt breathe anymore. I, who always accompanied him during
quarantine by FaceTiming him or calling him every morning and night, could

not accept the fact that he did not tell me that he couldn't hold the pain any
longer but pretended to be just fine. Even when he was in quarantine he told
me that he could feel the pain but it was not that severe and that i didn't have
to worry about him. That's what I thought, but he lied. A small yet furiously
stabbing pain.

I got out of my bed and opened the white window curtains to allow the
sunlight to enter my white oak wood windows. I turned to the wall beside my
windows and saw our photos, me and the man I loved very much. There were

happy faces smiling and holding teddy bears in front of the big Disneyland
sign. It was beautiful but couldn't be repeated. Just a beautiful yet sad memory
for me to hold of him. I looked at the photo once again and went to open my
phone. I opened my reminders and suddenly remembered that when he was in
quarantine, he gave me a quest. I didn't really think about it as I did not expect
him to leave me that fast. In the reminders it was entitled, ‘Alex’s last quest for
me’.

“Take all our memories and moments together and go to the place that we
frequently spent, which is the field that was meant only for us. Lie down there
and talk to the sky about us, about our love, about me, about our feelings and
about the future we talked about.” I read the reminder out loud and suddenly a
tear escaped from my eyes.

My heart felt a sting of melancholy and confusion as i knew, i was not strong
enough to do that however i remembered that he was watching me from

above, a place that i had never visited however i could guarantee that the place
was full of flowers and beautiful waterfalls, a place that he may find peace.

I went to the bathroom and washed my face then changed my clothes to get
ready to go. I turned off my air conditioner and called Angel to follow me out
of my door. I went to the parking lot of my apartment and started my red
Ferrari car engine. It was my favourite car as it was a present from Alex to me

on my 19th birthday.

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