Page 29 - Healthy (March - April 2020)

BODY CONFIDENCE

‘I walked down to the water’s
edge, and threw of my sarong.
I turned around, and started
posing, as if I was in a photo
shoot. I shouted, “Mum, look at
me!” and she started laughing.
It was such a relief. I said,
“Mum, everything’s going to be
all right now.”
‘The rest of the holiday was
amazing, and a year later I went
on holiday and wore bikinis
and a smile every day. I had
people approaching me, telling
me how conident I was. It was
such a good feeling. People say
I look at “be conident”, but it’s about
learning to love what you have.
my body ‘Even though baring my body
scared me, I carried on. It made
now and me feel good, lifting the burden
my mum had carried for so long.
appreciate I realised I could help others, too.
I did a video reveal on Facebook,
it’s what’s and messages of thanks came
in from around the world. I’ve
kept me since founded the Love Disigure
(lovedisigure.com) support
going network. There are so many
of us out there. I’m trying to
push us into the “body positive”
community, which is proving diicult. It’s focused on plus-size,
and that worries me. Why must it just be for one type of person?

SEISMIC CHANGE
‘Towards the end of my 40s, I spent a lot of time locked away,
crying and refusing to speak to anyone. I carried a suicide
note around with me. I’ve sufered with severe depression
my whole life. Now, my life is unrecognisable. I look at my
body and appreciate that it’s what has kept me going through
life. I survived. I’ve got grandchildren. I’ve got so many
clothing. Boyfriends were diicult as I felt the need to explain friends – I didn’t have any before. When people used to take
that I had scars, then if they wanted to walk away they could – photos of me, I’d hang my head down, my hair covering my
and they did, most of the time. My conidence was so low, face. Now, I’ve done loads of photo shoots, and I love them.
I walked out of uni and never showed up to job interviews. ‘I’m swimming again, which makes me feel good. As
my scars don’t stretch, I need to keep moving to avoid my
CROSSROADS muscles seizing up. I could have more operations, but now
‘Three years ago, I had a turning point. I was 47 and on I’m older I feel it’s best if I concentrate on things like yoga,
holiday with my mum and son. I always cover up, but my which I really enjoy. I love spinning too – I go in a two-piece
sister had given me a purple bikini, and one day I wore it, with all my stomach folds out. I know people are looking at
thinking I’d wear a sarong and make sure nobody was sitting me, but I don’t care. I hope I can show others they can do it.
behind me. At the beach, we sat away from everyone else, ‘I wish I’d been able to accept my scars earlier. I thought
and it was then my mum asked me about my scars. She I was the only person who didn’t it in. To anyone going through
hadn’t seen them since I was young, and asked if I was in something similar, I’d say, don’t give up on social media. You can
pain. I explained, yes, I always was, but it was something I’d ill your feed with positivity. There’s such diversity out there. If
learned to live with. Her head hung down, and it was only how I look can help one person, that means the world to me.’
then I realised she felt guilty. I didn’t want my mum to go Sylvia Mac is an ambassador for Live Well London, the UK’s
through that. She was really sufering. most inclusive wellbeing festival. livewelllondon.com

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