Page 175 - (DK) Danger! Open with Extreme Caution!

Qin ranavalona
Shi Huang the Cruel
(259–210 bce) (1782–1861)
That’s nothing, Nero. When some stuffy People say that I murdered my
old scholars disagreed with me—me, husband to make myself queen of
the first emperor of China!—I buried Madagascar. I’m not telling. But it’s true
hundreds of them alive. And see those that I terrorized and starved my subjects.
terra-cotta soldiers over there? I have One favorite trick was to dangle my
8,000 of them guarding my tomb. enemies above a ravine and then cut
Thousands of people died building it, the rope, More tea, anyone?
but as long as I’m safe for all
eternity, who cares?

Vlad
the impaler
(1431–1476)
Mmm, these stake sandwiches
are absolutely scrumptious! As
the prince of Wallachia, I’m always
having to deal with my rotten
Ivan enemies—thousands and thousands
the Terrible of them over the years. I like to
6
10
impale them on wooden stakes.
(1530–1584)
It’s the best entertainment I know.
My Russian subjects made me You should try it, Ivan.
really angry, so I set my private army
on them. For seven years they went on
the rampage—looting, burning, killing,
and torturing. They wore black, and their
emblem was a dog’s head and
broom. Down, Fido—I’ll feed you
an aristocrat soon.

MAD MONARCHS 175
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