Page 29 - Berg_Mortuary_Bishops_Guide

BERG MORTUARY 29

ON DEATH AND DYING

William M. Timmins

In the last few months I have realized that there is much we can do to make life easier for those
who are dying.

Nearly a decade ago, as a bishop, I interviewed a young man about going on a mission.
When he said he wanted to go, I was grateful, for I felt that he’d be an outstanding missionary.
He was a student-body leader, a ward youth leader, tall, athletic, and so handsome that girls ev-
erywhere were attracted to him. I’ve never known a finer, more wholesome young man. A week
later, he and a friend from another area were killed when a drunken driver crossed the center
line and rammed their car.

The youth of my ward and stake were stunned—they couldn’t understand how such a thing
could happen. They wept, their faith wavered. For days, groups of young people came to my
home to cry and talk and pray about the tragedy of this young man’s death.
His funeral drew so many people that the chapel, cultural hall, and foyers were filled. As I rose to

close the funeral, I was prompted to ask the congregation to form a giant chain—all of us holding
hands. Then our ward Young Women president led us in closing prayer. It was a memorable spiritual
experience. The youth wept openly, vented sorrow, confronted tragedy and loss, and had their faith
restored or strengthened. For years, they told me that meeting had changed their lives forever—some
went on missions who hadn’t planned to go, others set goal of temple marriage, others changed their
life-styles to be in more complete harmony with gospel principles.
The “human chain” idea at the young man’s funeral came to me through inspiration while I
was standing at the pulpit. Only now do I realize how right that was.

Over the fifty-two years of my life, I’ve been in three bishoprics and served as a bishop, high
councilor, quorum leader, and missionary. But only in the last few months have I realized how
awkwardly, and sometimes wrongly, many of us handle the death and dying of others. At this
moment, my experiences with the end of mortal life are firsthand, because I am dying of cancer
and kidney failure. I know now that even though we mean well, we often blunder, offend, and

ignore. Let me illustrate.
How come bad things happen to good people? Many books have addressed this subject, but
they tend to have a shortsighted view of God and life. For Latter-day Saints, far better answers
are in Tragedy or Destiny? by President Spencer W.Kimball. (Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co.,
1977.) Even President Kimball admits some deaths just don’t make sense but that sometimes