Page 158 - SHERLOCK transcripts

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221B BAKER STREET. Mrs Hudson picks up a mug and an almost empty bottle of milk from the
mantelpiece and walks into the kitchen, tutting in exasperation at the mess in there. Putting the
mug onto the table she takes the milk across to the fridge door and opens it, recoiling from the
smell emanating from inside. Putting the milk into the fridge door she picks up the offending
smelly item and drops it into the bin, then pulls open the salad crisper at the bottom and takes
out a clear plastic bag from it. Peering at the contents, she cringes when she realises what’s
inside.
MRS HUDSON: Ooh dear! Thumbs!
(She drops the bag back into the salad crisper, then turns as an overweight man stumbles into
the kitchen from the landing and stares at her wide-eyed and confused.)
MAN: The door was ... the door was ...
(He breathes heavily, then drops to the floor in a faint. Mrs Hudson stares at him in terror for a
moment, then calls out.)
MRS HUDSON: Boys! You’ve got another one!
(She bends down to the unconscious man.)
MRS HUDSON: Ooh!

Later the man – whose name is Phil – has regained consciousness and is sitting on a dining
chair facing the fireplace, staring rather blankly in front of himself. John is sitting on the sofa
behind him and Sherlock is out of sight but presumably pacing.
SHERLOCK (sternly): Tell us from the start. Don’t be boring.
(Flashback to fourteen hours earlier. Somewhere out in the countryside Phil’s car has broken
down in a quiet country lane. He tries to start the engine for what is apparently the umpteenth
time but it just whines and refuses to start. Phil slams his hands angrily onto the steering wheel
and gets out again to stare uselessly down under the open bonnet and tweak a few connections
hopefully. He looks around but there is no sign of any other traffic. He looks into the field at the
side of the road. The field stretches down to a river some distance away and a man wearing a
red jacket is standing at the edge of a stream which leads down to the river. He has his back to
the road. Phil peers at him for a moment but he’s too far away to have even noticed what’s
happening on the road and eventually Phil gets back into the car again and tries once more to
start the engine. It whines ferociously and then loudly backfires. Phil sighs, then looks across
towards the river and realises that the man is now lying on the ground. He gets out of the car
and stares.)
PHIL (calling out): Hey! Are you okay?
(The man doesn’t respond or react.)
PHIL (starting to walk towards him): Excuse me! Are you all right?
(As yet unseen by Phil, the man has fallen onto his back. There is a lot of blood underneath the
back of his head.)

Many hours later a crime scene has been set up at the riverside. A young police officer brings a
mobile phone over to Detective Inspector Carter.
POLICE OFFICER: Sir. Phone call for you.
CARTER (taking the phone and speaking into it): Carter.
(Lestrade is at the other end of the line, sitting in his car in Baker Street.)
LESTRADE: Have you heard of Sherlock Holmes?
CARTER: Who?
LESTRADE: Well, you’re about to meet him now. This is your case. It’s entirely up to you. This
is just friendly advice, but give Sherlock five minutes on your crime scene and listen to
everything that he has to say. And as far as possible, try not to punch him.
(While Lestrade has been speaking, a car has driven up and stopped near the crime scene.
Carter looks at the phone in bewilderment as Lestrade ends the call. The young police officer
has been leaning into the car speaking to the person in the back seat.)
POLICE OFFICER: Okay.
(He turns to Carter as he approaches.)
POLICE OFFICER: Sir, this gentleman says he needs to speak to you.
CARTER: Yes, I know. (He walks closer to the car.) Sherlock Holmes.
JOHN (getting out of the car and shaking Carter’s hand): John Watson. Are you set up for Wi-
Fi?

221B. Yawning, Sherlock wanders out from the hallway behind the kitchen and strolls into the
kitchen wearing only a sheet wrapped around him.

Transcripts by Ariane DeVere (arianedevere@livejournal.com)