Page 143 - (DK) Home Doctor: Providing practical advice on home treatments

COMMON CONDITIONS: CHILDREN’S PROBLEMS 141

Temper tantrums

Most parents of young children have some experience of temper tantrums. When a child feels frustrated,
tired, hungry, or overstimulated he or she may rage, cry, scream, and stamp, kicking and hitting anyone or
anything close by. Some children vomit, or more rarely, hold their breath to the point of fainting. Tantrums
start some time after 1 year, reach a peak between 2 and 3, and usually stop by 4 years. They are part of
normal development, but avoiding triggers (such as the child being overtired) will make them less frequent.

See your doctor first
PREVENTION
Make an appointment to see your doctor if:
Avoiding triggers for tantrums
● Your child is having breath-holding attacks
If your child is prone to temper tantrums, it helps
● Your child hurts him- or herself or others
to identify situations and frustrations that trigger
during temper tantrums
them. Avoiding them may prevent some tantrums
or at least make them milder and less distressing.
● Don’t ignore your child. If you are engrossed in
What you can do yourself other activities, such as speaking on the phone or
trying to finish some work, take a break.
During a tantrum, use the following tips to calm ● Have reasonable expectations. Notice and reward
the situation and cope with it constructively. positive behavior in your child and ignore minor
● At the first signs of a tantrum, try to find and deal negative behavior. Don’t fight over trivial matters.
● Save a firm “no” for things that are important,
with the cause. For example, offer a snack if you
suspect your child is hungry, or read a story if he such as safety issues or behavior that causes
potential harm to the child or to others.
or she seems exhausted but too agitated to sleep.
● Give your child some control by offering choices
Give the child your undivided attention if possible. instead of instructions. Limit the choices to a simple
● Even if there is no obvious cause for a tantrum, “either/or” for a young child, such as “Would you
don’t get angry. Shouting and hitting will frighten like to wear your shoes or your sandals?” or “Would
you like to go to the park or play in the garden?”
your child and make the behavior worse. Show
● Try to keep to regular meals, sleep, and playtimes
that you still love your child in spite of the tantrum.
to prevent your child from becoming hungry or
● During a full-blown tantrum, it may be hard to overtired. If there is a change in the daily schedule,
get through to your child. As long as the child is prepare your child by explaining as much as can
in a safe place and not harming him- or herself be understood and by ensuring that the child has a
or others, it may be better to let the tantrum run favorite item such as a toy or book.
● Young children are often frustrated because they
its course. Stay where your child can see you.
cannot express themselves. Talk to, listen to, and
● If a tantrum happens in a public place, ignore watch your child carefully so you are tuned in to his
the reaction of other people and try to remove or or her needs, likes, and dislikes.
deal with your child calmly and good-humoredly.
● Don’t give in to unreasonable demands or buy
your way out of trouble with treats. This will make
it more difficult to deal with the next tantrum. Seek further medical advice
● Breath-holding is usually harmless. During an Arrange to see your doctor if:
attack, lay your child flat on the ground. If the child ● You cannot cope with your child’s tantrums
passes out, stay calm; he or she will quickly regain ● Tantrums and breath-holding attacks
consciousness. If there is any delay or you are continue after the age of 4
concerned, however, seek immediate medical help.