Page 453 - Basic Japanese

use a more polite level of speech—the honorific style—in

speaking to older people, officials, strangers, guests, and so
forth. And even in the ordinary polite level you use to a
friend of your own age, it is customary to show deference to

the other person and his family by using exalted forms for
kinship terms and certain other words. Humble forms are

only used when speaking of yourself or members of your
family to other people. When directly addressing a member

of your family you use the exalted term if the person is
older, for example, Okāsan ‘Mother’ and Onīsan ‘Older

Brother.’ The given name is used if the person is younger:
Jirō ‘(younger brother) Jiro.’

For many expressions, including most nouns, there is no
special humble form. Instead, the neutral form is used for

the humble situations in contrast with the exalted form. In
speaking very politely to someone of equivalent social rank,

you usually use the exalted forms for reference to him or
her and his or her actions, and the simple neutral forms in

reference to yourself and your own actions, unless your
actions can be construed as involving the other person or
his or her family or property, or as involving someone else

of higher social status than yourself, in which case you use
the humble forms. If you are speaking to someone of much

superior social rank, for example as an employee talking to
her employer, you may use humble forms for yourself

throughout.

9.2. Kinship terms

The terms used to refer to members of a family come in
pairs: one neutral (also used for the humble situations

‘my…’) and the other exalted (‘your…’). For ‘his…,’ you