Page 331 - SHERLOCK transcripts

330

ARCHIE (turning to look at his mum): Beheadings.
SHERLOCK (quickly): Lovely little village.
(He unwraps Archie from around him and gently pushes him towards the entrance.)
MUM: Hmm? (She looks down at Archie as they go inside.) What did you say?

INSIDE. Molly is canoodling with Tom, repeatedly kissing his cheek. Tom indicates that the
photographer is approaching them, and she turns and smiles into the camera while he takes
some pictures.
PHOTOGRAPHER: Nice.
(He moves on to the next nearest couple, who are Mrs Hudson and what must surely be Mr
Chatterjee from the sandwich shop. Apparently Mrs H has forgiven him for already having two
wives – or she hasn’t yet found out about the one in Islamabad. She smiles happily for the
camera; Mr Chatterjee doesn’t look quite so happy to be there. The photographer turns and
snaps several pictures of Greg who is sitting at a table and drinking. Greg, looking a little glum,
raises his glass to him.
John and Mary are standing nearby. John indicates as a waiter approaches with a plate of
canapés.)
JOHN: Oh, d’you want ...?
MARY (taking one from the plate): I’m starving.
JOHN (declining the waiter’s offer of the plate): Thanks.
MARY: Had to lose so much weight to get into this dress.
(John chuckles. Sherlock and Janine are standing together a short distance away. Janine looks
admiringly at the waiter as he walks past.)
JANINE: He’s nice.
(Sherlock sniffs deeply.)
SHERLOCK: Traces of two leading brands of deodorant, both advertised for their strength,
suggestive of a chronic body odour problem manifesting under stress.
JANINE: Okay, done there. What about his friend?
(Sherlock turns to look where she’s looking. In the nearby kitchen, another waiter is carefully
pulling out the skewer from the middle of a large joint of roast beef.)
SHERLOCK: Long-term relationship, compulsive cheat.
JANINE: Seriously?
SHERLOCK: Waterproof cover on his smartphone. (Close-up of the phone in the man’s jacket
pocket.) Yet his complexion doesn’t indicate outdoor work. (Close-up of the man’s face.)
Suggests he’s in the habit of taking his phone into the shower with him, which means he often
receives texts and emails he’d rather went unseen.
JANINE (smiling admiringly at Sherlock): Can I keep you?
SHERLOCK: D’you like solving crimes?
JANINE: Do you have a vacancy?
(Sherlock’s eyes drift over to John, then he looks away again.
Mary puts a hand on John’s shoulder.)
MARY: So, Harry?
JOHN: Er, no. No show.
MARY: Darling, I’m so sorry.
JOHN: It was a bit of a punt asking her, I suppose. Still, free bar – wouldn’t have been a good
mix.
(He looks down, then raises his eyes towards the entrance and looks surprised.)
JOHN: Oh, God, wow!
(The scarred uniformed man we saw earlier has just walked in.)
MARY: Oh, G... Is that ...?
JOHN: He came!
(While Mary smiles with delight, John walks over to the man and they salute each other.
Sherlock walks over to Mary.)
SHERLOCK: So that’s him. Major Sholto.
(His voice sounds disapproving.)
MARY: Uh-huh.
(Sherlock narrows his eyes as he looks at the two men.)
SHERLOCK: If they’re such good friends, why does he barely even mention him?
MARY: He mentions him all the time to me. He never shuts up about him.
SHERLOCK: About him?
MARY: Mm-hmm.

Transcripts by Ariane DeVere (arianedevere@livejournal.com)